Your Ultimate Secret Weapon to Own the Room

own the room

One day, many years ago, I walked into a cosmetic vendor’s store. I may have come to get other things, but I remember that I was looking to get a new perfume in particular.

I studied the shelves for a minute and picked up a curious-looking green bottle. Yuck! I almost retched when I sniffed it. Meanwhile, I didn’t notice the smallish store owner studying me from the corner of his eye.

He walked up to me and a conversation ensued. He proceeded to pull a red bottle shaped like Snow White’s poisoned apple from the shelf.  “Try this one,” he said in scanty English, “very good.”  

I took the case from him and examined it; the bottle looked interesting. It had the word “Seduction” written diagonally in slightly calligraphic gold alphabets. I stuck my other arm out, sprayed a little on it, and took a sniff. Gosh!

I kid you not, one whiff of that perfume felt like the scent traveled through my nose down to my vagina. I felt myself get wet from all that it stimulated within me.

What’s crazy is that I would later discover that there is actually a connection between your nose, your memory, and your emotions. That mysterious bottle of perfume had taught me a valuable lesson that I was going to understand (and use) many years later.

Think about it for a moment; someone walks by, you catch a whiff of their perfume, and you immediately remember your ex-lover. You notice the aroma of Jollof rice in the air and are immediately transported back to glorious memories from your childhood.

 A pleasant scent is capable of working wonders on the human brain and if it is strong and regular enough, it can create a strong memory that will be triggered whenever you come in contact with that scent.

The perception of smell is handled by the olfactory bulb, which is a structure located at the front of the brain (no, it does not resemble a lightbulb, lol.) It sends information received from the nose to other parts of the brain for further processing and decrypting.

The scents you distinguish with your nose very quickly find their way to the limbic system, including the amygdala and the hippocampus: two regions of the brain that are known to deal with memory and emotions. So if you are in search of the ultimate secret way to own the room, think scent.

Perfume and Personality

Because smell is closely linked to the parts of the brain responsible for memory and emotion, a person’s cologne can easily make us create a subconscious link between them and a personality trait.

A person wearing strong OUD, for example, may be perceived as powerful, masculine, and aristocratic, while a person wearing a mild blend of flowers may subconsciously be perceived by others as more soft and sensual.

Again, this has little to do with the actual scent, and more to do with how we perceive it and the social interpretation our brains give to it.

This seemingly inconspicuous (albeit extremely important) fact makes it doubly important to choose your fragrance carefully. It has a lot more power over how you are perceived than you will ever know.

Smell and Seduction

In a research carried out on one hundred and thirteen women, 90% of them admitted that wearing a nice fragrance made them feel sexier. Moreover, it also helped them feel more appealing to others (especially love interests.)

According to another study, wearing specific scents like Vanilla can grab a man’s attention and make him remember you in a powerful way. They also stimulate his libido and get more blood flowing to his erogenous zones. *wink wink *

One sniff of a woman that smells delicious can send a man haywire. I remember an ex-lover of mine who bought a jar of my perfume and emptied it around his house because he said it reminded him of me whenever I was not around.

The best part is that it goes beyond the bedroom; your scent is a brand. It can help you dominate a boardroom, an event, or just turn heads when you walk into a space.

What type of Cologne should I wear?

When it comes to choosing the perfect cologne, there is one rule of thumb: choose a scent that both matches your personality and suits your intentions.

If you are an alluring siren, choose a feminine, seductive scent with notes of flowers or essential oils. If you are playful and bright, choose a warm fragrance with a fresh scent that reminds you of a happy, sunny day. If you are a sophisticated lady that loves money, mystery, and adventure, choose a fragrance with exotic notes like Tonka or Bergamot, and if you’re trying to seduce him, choose something intricate and feminine (preferably with a touch of Amber or Vanilla.)   

Regarding what to avoid, I always advise steering clear of those heady, artificial floral scents that smell cheap and come off way too strong. I also advise women to not wear men’s perfume. (I’m serious, ladies, don’t!)

Finally, think of your scent as your forerunner: the thing that introduces you before you get the chance to introduce yourself. What do you want it to say about you?

A Goddess’s Guide to Seducing Him with Your Scent

Yes, your scent is a brand and a brand is an identifying symbol. This means that if you have a man, he should be able to know when you walk into the room by catching a whiff of your scent. Even if it isn’t you who walks into the room, he’ll definitely think about you.

To achieve this, pick a signature scent. Your signature scent, simply put, is a fragrance you wear often. You switch it up now and then, or according to seasons. It will create that strong mental connection in the mind of your partner.

Once you have picked a signature scent that matches your personality and intentions, leave it everywhere. This is an INCREDIBLY powerful yet subtle move; it’s like always being there without being there. Make his house smell like you; his car, his sheets – oh, especially his sheets, (wink wink.) Leave a perfumed handkerchief behind, “forget” to pack a piece of clothing that smells like you when you’re leaving. This way, you can rest assured that you are always in his subconscious even when he’s not aware that you are. That’s what makes it powerful.

The second part is the way your space smells. Use aromatherapy to give him a sensory experience. Even if he doesn’t consciously notice it, trust me, his subconscious mind is listening.

Another great time to experiment with scents is during intercourse; yes, you read that right! From scented candles to incense burners and essential oil diffusers; sex is a great avenue to play around with scents. Since your man’s brain is more relaxed during sex, it is much easier to make a subconscious lasting impression on him with his sense of smell. Choose a very simple scent to achieve this. Don’t choose a candle or incense that contains a complicated layering of notes. Something as basic as strawberry or watermelon will do.

He will think about you and that night of steamy passion whenever he walks past the aromatherapy section at the local department store. You’re choosing something basic because you want him to encounter that scent somewhere else and easily identify it.

Back to My Perfume Story…

Regarding how my perfume story ended; well, I didn’t buy it. A previous version of me felt it was too scandalous to be wearing around, so I put it back on the shelf. Gosh, I wish I would find that bottle again!

Regardless, I’ve invested in many alluring scents since then (yes, it really is an investment), and the fact remains that there’s great power in your scent. Many people aren’t aware of this, to begin with, hence they will never harness its power.  Your scent can be powerful or seductive, energetic or repulsive. You decide.

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